Whatever You Do…Please Don’t Settle

Whatever You Do…Please Don’t Settle

What would you be if you could be ANYTHING?

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What would you be if you could be ANYTHING?

The sad reality is that most people settle.  They settle for underwhelming dreams.  They settle for unenthusiastic or even destructive ways of experiencing themselves and the world around them.  They settle for societal or social conditioning.  They settle by working at jobs that don’t work for them.  They settle for relationships that somehow serve a purpose but don’t feel right.  They settle for physical bodies that are unhealthy or uncomfortable.  Anxiety.  Depression.  Stress.  Unhappiness.  Boredom.  Dysfunction.  Complacency.  This is what settling feels like.

The sad reality is also that most people settle for very real and very convincing reasons.  They feel fearful.  Stuck.  Trapped.  Overwhelmed.  People settle because they don’t know how to change or to even believe that change is possible.  They rehearse limiting beliefs like “I don’t deserve it” or “I’m not good enough” or “People will judge me” or “I can’t because…”. 

Clients decide to work with me when they know they are settling.  Perhaps you feel a very subtle calling, find yourself daydreaming of a different version of your life, or have the awareness that you are engaging in unhealthy ways to compensate for what you are missing out on.  When this knowing is ignored…life eventually has a way of shaking us up and it’s usually not pleasant.  I’ve been there.  And I can help.

Once upon a time I created a life that looked like everything you are supposed to do and felt like nothing you are supposed to feel.  I settled for habits, emotions, people, and jobs that were the very definition of settling.  I settled because of fear…because of limiting beliefs I had about myself…and because I worried that the things I really wanted were not “realistic”.  I settled because I didn’t completely trust what lied outside my comfort zone and I didn’t completely trust the potential of my own vision.  And mostly, I settled because I didn’t even know I was settling…I was simply conditioned and preoccupied by the world around me who told consistent and formulaic stories about what dreams I “should” be chasing.  

We don’t know what we don’t know.

Until one day…sitting on my couch in Vancouver, Canada…watching a Janis Joplin documentary…I woke up.

“Now that I’m here, where am I?” she asked.

In that moment, my unintentional patterns of settling suddenly infiltrated my conscious mind…and I took one look at that shiny glass ceiling above my head and threw a fucking brick through it.           

Change is not easy.  Becoming your authentic self is not easy.  Pioneering a different way of life is not easy.  But imagine the rewards.  Imagine what’s on the other side of settling.  Magic.  Inspiration.  Peace.  Sincerity.  Trust.  Strength.  Confidence.

You only have this life.  This one chance to be you.  Whatever you do…please don’t settle.

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